so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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