I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
