we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize