I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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