when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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