how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
