How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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