stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Randomize
