new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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