You work out of a Hotel?
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
