One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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