Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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