Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
farters have to be the big spoon...
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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