I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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