You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize
