so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize