So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize