I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
