she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
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