Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize