I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
