New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Randomize
