Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
God, I missed his penis.
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