And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Just puked most of my soul out..
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
