is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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