I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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