Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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