You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
