He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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