ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
