No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
