Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Thank you for not boning my boss.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
