i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize