Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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