i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Randomize
