I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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