you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
