Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
The Olympian is in my bed
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
