Pants 0. Shit 1.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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