so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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