apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Randomize
