New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
