i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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