she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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