this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize