I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
