i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
