real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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