I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
