I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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