idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
tell me about the eggs
Randomize