he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
false alarm. still invincible.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Randomize